Tag Archives: lady

Fairy Tale Romance v. Real Tale Romance

Love is in the air, I can smell it and I can almost feel it but am not there yet, ha maybe it’s the weather and if you like call me an incurable romantic, but I have always fantasized on a lot of things. Love has not been left out in my fantasies as my imagination can be very wide and I am certain I am not alone in my imaginations as we all have dreams on the type of person we would want to date or get married to. It has always been referred to as “our dream man or dream woman or prince charming, or the knight in shining armor or the princess or the perfect woman.

I shall focus on men in this segment while the second segment shall focus on women. Now, before I start writing on and on about men, it would interest you to know a little bit about me. I am the type of lady who dreams and fantasizes for hours, perhaps it’s a gift as writing comes naturally to me and I heard that great writers have great imaginations, If this is really true then I am on my way to greatness. I have never really had a dull moment with myself as I fill it up with good imaginations of good food, good clothes, the love of God, the injustice in the world (especially Nigeria), poverty in Nigeria and of course love is also not left out in my imaginations, etc. Ok, let’s leave these topics for days to come.

Now, every man has a dream woman or princess or desired woman that they would like to end up with, some men think these women are way above their class due to their educational background, their beauty, their manners etc. Most men I have had the opportunity of having a decent conversation with have expressed their desires on the type of women they want as a girlfriend or as a spouse.  They have given me descriptions in full details ranging from her physical appearance -to most short men – a tall woman is the perfect match for them and to some very dark-skinned men- a fair complexion woman would do the magic –  Some men love their women to have the African stature fats in the right places such as the back sides and the hips as well as the front sides, while other prefer their women to be skinny or slim with some sort of shape – popularly known as the “figure 8” shape. Some men prefer their women to be heavily endowed with massive mounds of flesh in all parts of the body. Now whatever, the taste is, all men have a physical picture of their dream woman in their heads.  Men also have a picture of the character of the woman who they intend to date or wed, most men prefer peaceful women who can be motherly and homely, some men do not really mind as long as the woman is good to them, they don’t mind if she is nasty and cruel to others, some men only prefer their women to be beautiful and they don’t mind if she is not homely.

Now whatever the taste a man has, can this taste be said to only exist in fairy tale romance? Fairy tale romance as we all know are not real as they exist just in our imaginations unusual happiness which does not seem to have an end. Human beings cannot be happy all the time, there are times in our lives when we are filled with sadness, though not for long. There are also times when we have hitches in our relationships, when that special person does not seem special to us any more, when the dream woman becomes a reality and does not look all that nice as we imagined her to be. And so it is for the Nigerian man whom I spotted with an old maybe American or European lady.
To be continued...

Fostering Professionalism: A peep into the relationships between employers and employees (cont’d)

https://floramichaels.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/6a00df351d779488330148c6c45704970c-320wi.jpg?w=277I understand that it is not only impossible but equally insane for an employer to sacrifice his profit making business at the altar of developing a wonderful relationship with his employees by not disciplining them when they are wrong or going tough on them to produce the desired result by having the work done.  However, when an employer fails to reward a very hard working employee their relationship becomes strained depending on the circumstances and the attitude of the employer. For instance an employer who would rather reward a lazy employee by promoting same because that employee has a connection to some top government official or influential business man and in the case of a government parastatal because that employee is actually a relative to a key government official. In such a circumstance, the employer has destroyed whatever good and lasting relationship it might or could have built with the hardworking staff and in its stead has given birth to a monstrous relationship characterized by grudges and complaint.  The aggrieved hardworking employee would find it difficult to have a healthy relationship with the employer and trust me it happens in corporations irrespective of the size.

Another question that gripped me tightly and refuse to let go until I gave it some attention is ‘why do some employees like the lady above steal from their employers’  Her reason was simple as she said it was a way to punish him for sexually harassing her. Can you believe it?  Maybe once a thief always a thief and also a liar.  Although, sexual relations can brew between the employer and employee it might be permissible where both parties agree to partake in it. However, where the employer uses threat and intimidation to sexually harass his employee then in my opinion I would say he is destroying the interpersonal relationship that exists and replacing it with a more hostile emotion called hatred. He is also an example of a bad employer who deserves nothing but bad employees who would eventually run down his business. The examples or illustrations of bad employers and employees are innumerable, as I cannot go on about it.


What matters most in an employer and employee relationship is understanding on the part of the employer when the employee has personal issues such as family problems, understanding on the part of the employee when the employer has financial issues and cannot timeously fulfill the terms of the contract, trust on the part of the employee that the employer  would reward his/her hard work, the complete elimination of suspicion on the part of the employer, patience on the part of the employer to its employee, mutual respect and civility on the part of both the employers and employees,  loyalty on the part of the employee by not abusing the position of trust whatever that may be, this and many more would make an employer and employee  develop a long and lasting relationship and even when the employee has decided to move on by leaving that employment their relationship would remain cordial for all intents and purposes.