The evil side of humanbeings: A must read for ladies

A friend sent me this article yesterday and after reading it, I felt a lot of emotions, from anger, to sadness and that’s when I made the decision to share  it on my blog because a lot of evil people are out there trying to take advantage of naive girls. Little wonder women are also classified as vulnerable.  Most importantly as an advocate for  human rights, I am of the firm opinion that the treatment meted out on those 8 girls violated their right to human  dignity. I know that in a developed country those men would be persecuted. We should learn to rise against the Nigerian societal condemnation and fight for our human rights rather than cooking up moral justification for the evil acts of those 8 evil married men. Please Nigerians now is the time to campaign against the degrading  treatment been meted out on women. Let us imagine for a moment if our sister, wife or even a dearest friend was treated this way.

                                         
Hi, I am Tonia (not real name), a girl who has fears, beliefs, reservations and just your regular typical Nigerian girl. This past few weeks has been one hell of a game for me. I have really been unsettled and I thought I share this story with you.

“When Cynthia (the lady killed in the hotel room in Festac, Lagos) surfaced on the internet and various news media, I was scared and it brought back a whole lot of memories to me and also served as and eye opener. Many people castigated and criticised Cynthia (may her
gentle soul rest in peace), but my point is, it could have been anybody, anybody at all.

“We have met people through various social media. Some have ended up well, some have not but with painful memories. To cut the long story short, let me kindly share with you my encounter with social media especially the very popular Blackberry Messenger (BBM).

“I am a graduate and currently serving in Kaduna. I could have runced it, but I needed somewhere to clear my head and forget about my ugly encounter. Here is my story.

“I happened to have a married man as a contact on my BBM. He had been asking me out for over six months and I refused to date him. As time went on, he invited me clubbing with him when his wife was outside the country, and I went with him all night. We spent most of the night at Swe bar, Lagos.

“I also met his clique of friends, married as well with their various mistresses. We had ‘mad’ fun. After all the clubbing and drinking, he lodged me in a hotel somewhere in Obalende. I felt sort of safe with him. We did not have sex, but he made sweet love to me and touched me in places I had never ever imagined.

“He kissed me passionately but guess what? He did not have sex with me. We did all sorts but there was no penetration. So, to an extent, I trusted he was a good person to be around with. I did not know that it was all part of the plan.

“He gave me N10,000 and put me in a cab to go home the next morning. We kept talking and chatting and sending naked pictures to each other and he told me naughty things of how he wanted to whisper things in my ear, I blushed. We didn’t see for two weeks and that was because his wife just came back from Turkey.

“One faithful evening, he pinged me that he was organising a beach party/boat cruise and that he would love for me to be his date and that he wanted to open a BBM chat, as a medium for his friends and my friends to interact. I was excited about it, I just wanted to have fun. I was able to get five of my very hot friends.

“The BBM group opened and we got chatting. I also realise that majority of them were married and working in reputable firms. It was fun and we didn’t mind if they were married, we just wanted to have fun, as well as some other girls apart from my friends in the group.

“We chatted exclusively, sent pictures to the BBM group to introduce ourselves, and we had opened group conversations pending the beach party. And as excited as we were, we went shoping for nice sexy beach wears.

“The D-day finally came, we all assembled at the Lagos Island Boat Club. I was wowed because it was a high class party. We were cruising in a boat loaded with goodies drinks and hot babes, and as well ‘MARRIED MEN’. I did not care, I just said in my mind that I would not roll with married men anymore after this, that for now, all I wanted to do was to catch some fun. After all, I wasn’t paying bills.

“We got there, it was a private beach resort. Most of the beach facilities I got to see there were owned by multinational companies. We got out of the boat, and went to where we were partying. It was a duplex made with wood. It was a very nice setting.

“I felt comfortable because it even had a fence around it separating it from other beach houses around. So, there was privacy and of course bouncers (heavy looking guys) guarding the place. I said to myself, this must be heaven, I must be dreaming.

“Anyways, we felt free with each other because we had been chatting. It was 5:30pm and the party just started. We had drinks flowing from the private bar tender which happens to be owned by one of the men in the group. Reality struck when I realized that I was feeling dizzy and feeling really funny and light headed. Not only me, but other girls around me too noticed there was something strange about it.

“I was also feeling HORNY as hell! I had been drugged. They monitored us and when they knew the drug had really gone deep into our system, they moved us up into the main beach house. I could still see faces, but was too weak and horny to react.

“Mr B, the man who took me clubbing, carried me in his hands like a sacrifice and put me down on the floor just as other men also did with their girls. We were eight in numbers; 8 girls, 8 guys, and they all stripped us down and had sex with us.

“I enjoyed it a bit because I was horny. It was a mixed feeling because I cried, I moaned, but I did not know how many times he came into me. He pounded me hard. I was dizzy, but he grabbed me with force. All I could notice was the wedding ring on his finger. I thought of how wicked and miserable some married can be. How inhuman and heartless they could be.

“All of them took turns in switching partners and slept with all of us. I passed out. That was the last thing I could remember. I felt water poured on me. I noticed all the other girls around me too were half-naked and some stark naked.

“We spent the night at the beach, but the men were nowhere to be found. I looked round me and all I could see was packs of used condoms. I ran to pick my cloths and possibly raise an alarm. I got dressed, found my phone with an envelope. It contained N16,000 and a note asking us to take N2000 each for transport. Tears of anger and rage filled my eyes and the girls around me as well.

“We were drugged and used like tissue paper. I grabbed my phone and noticed a ping came in. I checked my phone and I noticed the BBM group had been deleted, and a message via BBM from MR B came in. He threatened me that if I say a word to anyone, I would regret it.

“I told him he was a bastard, and he said try it. A picture came in, several pictures. In fact, they were pictures of us being naked on the floor. Pictures of the humiliating us but they blurred the faces of the men. In total, I got 20 pictures. I was not myself for a month.

“I went back to school, I had no one to talk to. The rest of the semester was hell for me. My CGPA dropped drastically. It was the worst out of the worst result I ever had.

“Till today, my friends and I have not discussed this with anyone, but all I could do when I heard of Cynthia’s story was to narrate my own ordeal anonymously and spread the news, the word, and pray they see it and changed their ways.

“I am now born again. I have given my life to Christ. I fear men so much that I cannot even move close to them. I still have nightmares, but with time, God will strengthen me and I will move on. My advice to single ladies out there is, do not be desperate for fun. Pray to God to open your eyes of understanding, and pray hard. He who kneels before God will stand before kings and queens.

“To all married women, pray hard to God to intervene in your marriages and turn your husbands from bad habits to and bad friends. As for me, I do not think I ever want to get married or date a man again. That chapter has been closed for good in my life.

Please, do not ignore my mail. Please post it. There are a lot of things we ladies need to learn including you. Please post it on your blog and save a soul. It could be your friend, sister, cousin, neighbour.

“God bless you as you pass it on. To all readers, I do not care if you insult me or rain abuses at me. My job is to share this encounter with you and save you from any mishap. God bless you all. Amen.”

The love of a man: Can a man truly love his woman?

The inspiration to write on this topic all started with an Indian movie I saw over the weekend. You know the Bollywood Movie industry is the second biggest movie industry in the world ranking next to Hollywood. I have always admired the Indian movies for one thing, they have a way of showing us what is obtainable in their country because they are deeply rooted in their culture and not even the so-called civilization has managed to separate them from their culture. I love their dresses and as my cousin would say they are so colorful and their women are a beauty to behold. Well, despite the recent happenings in the movie industry where every country is planning to outdo the other. The Indians have somehow managed to stick to their language with subtitle in English so that people like you and I can also enjoy their movies. I was flipping through the TV stations when I stumbled upon this particular Indian movie. I can’t write the name of the movie because it was in Indian and a bit too long.

The story line was perfect and I predicted what would happen in the movie long before it did. You see the story was about a lady who was in love with another man but her dad gave her out in marriage to a completely different man. She was unhappy in her husband’s house until some messenger gave her letters from her lover but her happiness was short-lived when her husband saw the letters and got very upset. However, he loved her dearly and decided to travel with her in search of her lover who was in a different country. His rationale was simple, he said that as her husband he promised her happiness and if her happiness lies in the arms of another man so be it. It was part of his duty to give her happiness.

I will pause here, because I wondered if it were possible in reality for a man to give out what he claims to love so dearly to another man. You know some men have connived with their wives to have intercourse with another man for monetary gains and after that they treat the woman like garbage. The woman fails to understand why the man she sacrificed everything for would treat her that way. I guess I might have the answer to that question, men by their very nature are selfish and they only think of themselves and things that make them happy. However, the love of a man is beyond a man’s happiness, love affects the happiness of others. Love is not selfish or cruel, it is kind and patient. I have always cautioned people when they say “I love you” because it connotes a lot of meanings and it entails a lot of hard work. Can a man love his wife selflessly, can he give her out to someone else in order to give her happiness, can he sacrifice all he has for the woman he loves. Don’t men always think they should reserve a little for themselves?

Back to the movie, the husband of the woman almost lost his life for her, he stayed by her side when she was injured and even when they had no money he was willing to sacrifice all just to make sure she was reunited with her lover. The woman i.e his wife fell in love with him and when she eventually met her lover she told him that she must fulfill her duties to her husband because he taught her how to abide in love.  Yeah Happy ending for her husband, but how many men out there can be like that woman’s husband?

Most men can’t even look their wives in the face once she has hurt them, they rather seek solace in the arms of another woman for physical pleasure that cannot last a life time.  Rather than taking the bold step to win their wife’s love, they would rather stay out late or focus on their games or whatever it is that gives them pleasure.  In reality, is it possible for a man to truly love a woman? Despite the fact that she annoys him? Once a man makes up his mind to love a woman, I know he can tolerate all and everything that she throws his way, of course with the exception of violence.

I believe this is food for thought for all the men out there.

Cheers!

What women really want

 

 

I was accused of not writing on ‘what women really want’ the male folks attributed their accusations to the fact I am a woman and I assume that everyone knows what women want. I promised to write on what women really want. But before I delve into this topic, I would like to say Ramadan Kareem to the Muslims. However, I noticed that the prices of food have been increased due to the Ramadan season. It makes me wonder when Nigerians would stop being opportunists. Is this obtainable in other parts of the world? Have the prices of food in Countries  where Muslims observe Ramadan been increased as well?  Please I need comments on this issue.

What women want is quite simple and uncomplicated contrary to what most men would like to believe. Women love and crave for comfort. They want to have the best of the world, designer shoes, designer bags, designer dresses, wrist watches, jewelry, exotic cars, a magnificent house, choicest holiday resort, enough money to cook great meals and a good and reliable man. Hmmm!!!!

I read a joke yesterday which made me laughed so hard,  briefly put the joke was about a lady who  was asking for way too much as her birthday gift from her “boyfriend” She wanted Brazilian hair, designer shoes, designer bags and the likes. The “supposed boyfriend” absconded after being presented with the birthday list.

Despite that joke, we must know that women are wonderful beings that can multiply whatever you can give them.  For instance give a woman a house and she turns it into a home. Thus, if the whole package of being comfortable that is having all the enumerated designer stuff  or normal basic stuff comes with a man, then a woman is more than satisfied. Women also love attention and affection, they love communication as well.  I am of the opinion that one of the greatest causes of nagging is lack of communication. When a man fails to communicate with his woman it results to incessant nagging as all form of understanding from that woman evaporates. Women should also realize that men cannot multi task like women and therefore find it difficult to manage communication over a period of time. (It will amaze you to know that some men are damn good in communication) You may ask what about  women who are not materialistic and who are independent enough to provide for their  needs.  Well, such women desires affection and attention, since they have the money to take of their needs. They desire companionship. Women were created to help men and this purpose pushes the desire in women want to fix things all the time. Women   also want to look good all the time but not all women want designer stuffs,  however all women want is a good man who can provide for them and be as strong as a rock in times of their need.

Cheers!